Dark Lady Maya's Secret Journal
by mistress-reebi
Summary: [PostGame] Maya, whom everyone thought was innocent, has plans on taking over Efferia. Her secret journal outlines her plot. [Contains mild spoilers] crack fic
1. March 24

Disclaimer: I don't own anything! Soft Max, Atlus and Banpresto are the owners of this game. I'm not making any money off of this crappy attempt at a fanfic, so please don't sue me.

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Entry One:

Wow, so much has happened over the last year. The war is over and those Dark Yason's plans have been foiled. That's a good thing because I (Dark Lady Maya) am the only one who shall take over the world. My special plans to take Efferia are now going to come into affect. Mwahahahaha (evil grin) These plans of doom shall commence at precisely 02:18 tomorrow morning. Here is phase one of my spiffy plan :) :

Steal Eonis' collection of yaoi fanart, fanfic, manga, manhwa, etc. Even her live action gay porn collection; anything invovling hott, naked guys screwing each other. The Dark Lady Maya needs her man candy! (drools) Once I take over the world, all me shall be gay! Except for one because I need some loving, maybe even five. Well, Efferia is half there because there are a lot of men who dress and resemble females. (cough) CALINTZ (cough) He will be the only man clothed once I take over the world. How dare he have sexier hips than I do! There is no way a man's hips shall be something a woman shall envy.

Steal an airship, not that crappy one Chris and his father made; one that holds a thousand women, not men, women! Seriously, I don't know how we made it alive all over Efferia since pieces kept flying off every second. I am the Dark Lady Maya, ghettoness isn't my style. The airships the alliance owns are sturdy, but those jerks are idiot drivers! I swear, even Reith drunk can drive better than those morons. Let's crash into the desert for no apparent reason! Stupid jerks, how dare they have the Dark Lady Maya stranded in the horrible desert of doom! I must shoot that jerk once I become Queen.

Burn things! Burn the damn headquarters! Burn the forest! burn the adorable bunnies! Burn everything! Mwahahahahaha

Shoot Justina in the head. Do I need to explain myself?

Give Azel a haircut. I am jealous of his beautiful hair that flows gently in the wind. Also, it's just so pretty I'm so jealous! The way it flips out... BURN EVERY STRAND INTO ASHES!

Straggle Serina for Reith. Why? Reith gave me cookies. Mmmmm cookies. Also, it will be the final unification between yaoi fangirls and hetro ones. (1)

Steal Roxy and Carian's stripper wear and burn it! I like to burn things.

That's phase one of my excellent plan. Now, which to do first? This is a toughie. Maybe, I'll deal with Eonis, Justina, Serina and Azel in their sleep. Excellent. I would like to see Serina and Justina suffer when they are awake, but I'm a busy woman who is trying to take over the world. Time is limited.

I need theme music. Amila had that choral whaling at the top of their lungs (very pretty music!) and the Blast Worms even had their own theme music. What about the Dark Lady Maya? She is far more superior and needs a special motif in her theme music. Hmmm... How about that gay Korean boyband that sings about balloons. It's a catchy song and a guilty pleasure, or is it just a guilty pleasure? How about those happy DDR song's. Decisions, Decisions. I got it! My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion! It's such a touching song. (snif) and so sad! WHY DID JACK HAVE TO DIE! (cries)

Well, those should be enough plans for phase one. It's already 20:46 on the night before, so I should get some rest before my big day tomorrow. (smiles) The Dark Lady Maya needs her rest.

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(1) My friend Becky told me to add that it. She made the unification line up, not me.

AN: My friend told me she found someone's plans to take over the world on the internet, which gave me this idea. I was going to have either Noel or Albel from Star Ocean (I might do a Noel version) do this journal, but I wanted to do another MC:TOB story. I can so see Maya trying to take over the world. 


	2. March 27

Disclaimer: I don't own anything! Soft Max, Atlus and Banpresto are the owners of this game. I'm not making any money off of this crappy attempt at a fanfic, so please don't sue me. Oh and I do not own the song, "God Save the Queen", which is a paraody. I don't think anyone would want to buy this garbage, therefore not even a penny in worthless Canadian dollars will fall into my hands.

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Entry Two:

Okay! My excellent plan was perfectly in place, but so many things went wrong! grrrrrr (eye twitch) I am so angry I need to burn something--anything! Maybe even a soul. I am just so mad that phase one was foiled! FOILED! No particular party prevented it from happing like what they do in Sailor Moon, Power Rangers, etc, just everything went wrong!

Okay, here _was_ the plan:

1) Play the theme music. Every phase will have theme music that way people will know who to fear and they shall know who is going to take over the world.

2) Grab Eonis' yaoi memorabilia and hide it under my mattress.

3) Chop off Azel's hair (after all, he is asleep)

4) Use Azel's hair as kindling for burning the headquarters

5) Shoot Justina while strangling Serina

6) Flee to Lester and steal an airship

Sounds like an east plan, eh? WELL YOU ARE FUCKING WRONG DIARY! FUCKING WRONG! YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE IT FAILED MISERABLY! Calm down Dark Lady Maya, think of calming waters and rainbows just like the theorist said. GRRRRRRRRRR (burn's Chris' room) Now that I got that anger off of my chest, I need to get what actually happened off. This is what happened when phase one came into practise:

When I played my beautiful theme music it was so loud (everyone must hear my theme music and fear me) it woke everyone up. And it wasn't even the right song! It was some stupid song by the Pussycat Dolls. I nearly became deaf by how loud it was, but it was part of the plan. Stupid Justina, Serina and Eonis were singing along to the theme music and dancing! Who does that in the middle of the night! I would have chucked rocks at whoever disturbed the Dark Lady Maya's sleep, but no, they had to sing and dance so happily! Justina pissed me off the most with her squeaking singing so I shot here right there in the forehead. (evil snicker) Because she got shot, everyone went into panic mode. They were very defensive and began to search the perimeter. I hide the gun in Queen Binky the Great II(a)'s pouch (she was the one who told me to burn things and take over the world for her. I am just her humble servant. One day Queen Binky the Great II will rule all over Efferia! (strokes her precious fur))

After a few hours when we realized the murderer was gone (hehehhee), was had a party celebrating her death. It was so much fun! Rianna was so drunk she starting dancing to the Spice Girls. I took advantage of her drunken state I told her we needed to go to Lester. After all, I need a distraction to steal and airship and drunken woman is a perfect way to catch the guard's attention. She surprisingly agreed because she said she wanted a new husband. I think Raul is not enough for her, but I guess she found out about him and Chris: (1) they knit tea cosies together. Rianna wants a real man like the romance novel covers Fabio portrays, not a tea cosy knitter!

Before we travel to Lester I went into Eonis' room to steal her yaoi collection. I was so surprised! It actually filled her entire room! Shonen-ai posters were all over the walls, covering them completely; books and videos all over the shelves, leaking unto the floor. When I opened her closet where she keeps the hardcore stuff, it rushed like a water fall, falling at me and the floor, practically knocking me out. I couldn't get up for minutes! I'm surprised the collect actual fit in that closet the way everything was packed together! This will be hard to steal all and attempt to cram this into my matress, so I grab a few books into my pockets :) (smiles).

Azel follows me in as I gather the graphic novels. He told me if I liked seeing guys kiss I shouldn't bother stealing this stuff and have Calintz and Agraien pose because they have no shame. I guess he is right because who hold private meetings in the bedroom? (1)And then he asks me why the man behind one of the guys is hurting the other and what the hell is going on with these two when he saw the posters in the closet. Also, why are they naked? I had to explain to him the birds and the bees, well; the bees and the bees, and you should have seen the look on his face. His jaw dropped so low, it was almost as if someone broke it and it hung there. His eyelids were all the way open. Just pure horror. And this is coming from a man who is in love with Calintz.

Eonis walked in, giggly so I jumped out the window, grabbing Azel's wrist with me. I was going to wait until she left the room, but I hear Harens voice with her and decided to leave for Lester. I had no clue where Rianna went, probably getting into a fight with someone, so I left with Azel. That's killing two birds with one stone! I slowly walked behind him with the scissors in my hands and then he turned around. I quickly placed them behind my back, acting as if nothing happened and they he started to confess his love for me. He says Calintz could never love him and he wants to move on. Why with a girl, I have no clue. I wasn't offended if he thought of me as a guy he was attracted to because look at Calintz! He's girlier looking than I am! Maybe Azel is straight after all. I tossed the scissors away because his hair is just so beautiful; I can't cut it off. Plus, now he is one of Queen Binky the Great's II allys. (1)He doesn't know it, but I can see some sort of use for him. Of course, he won't get any specialties when we take over the world, but we'll use him to do some of our dirty work. Mwahahahahahahaha (evil grin)

I was going to burn the headquarters on the way to Lester but I realized someone. I would burn Eonis' yaoi collection! I can't do that. Hot men will be melting away by the flames of death, burning their beautiful figures. Just the thought of that makes me cry! I burned the forest along the way to Lester instead. mwahahaha. Take that, plants!

Stupid Azel made me get lost! We ended up in Bayer! How we ended up there, I don't know, but now I'm freezing to death! It's just so cold when you aren't in the floating city, which you need an airship for. gggrrr! So, when we find a way to get out of here. I will steal an airship!

Things left to do:

Steal an airship, strangle Serina, and steal more yaoi! Oh, most importantly, kick Azel five hundred times in the head (maybe groin would work better) and get out of Bayer!

So, those are the reason's why phase one failed. Phase two will come into practise when I get out of here. My hands are just so cold I can barely feel them and I'm wearing gloves! Eonis says her outfit is appropriate for Bayer but that is an obvious load of bull! Just because you're a slut Eonis, doesn't mean you have to wear nothing in sub zero temperatures! What crack was she on when she said that? I'm freezing my ass off and I'm wearing a poofy dress! The Dark Lady Maya and Queen Binky the Great II doesn't deserver to be in these temperatures! That is all I have to say for now, unless Azel pisses me off again.

(a)Queen Binky the Great I was traveling with me when we had to gather the shards. It was such a long journey for her she had to retire to pass her duties on to the next generation. (1) Her daughter, Queen Binky the Great II, requested everyone to sing this song in honour of her when she becomes Queen of Efferia.

God save Queen Binky the Great

Hail Queen Binky the Great

God protect Queen B

Send her all youthful souls

Dictatorship is her ultimate goal

Fascism is another goal

God protect Queen B 

Note: These lyrics are a parody

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(1) My friend Becky told me to add those in. She was thinking about having Raul and Chris be gay, but I added the tea cosy thing in, and it also shows they are gay for each other.

AN: Thanks Becky making suggstions! I got the name Dark Lady from this creepy guy at Anime North. He kept calling himself the Dark Lord something (I forget, he scared me) and I figured the Dark Lady Maya would suit her better than a dark lord.  



	3. April 1

Entry Three:

Finally, we are out of stupid Bayer! I'm still freezing my ass off, but at least it isn't sub-zero temperatures with snow! I don't see why people like snow. It's cold, wet, and gets all over you. It's like sand only cold and wet! Anyways, back to stupid Bayer. When he landed in Bayer Azel, being the man, decided that he would lead us out. Of course we ended up even further north and way past the Fields of Norton. It made me wish I were actually there; it was so cold! Why are men so horrible with directions? I knew my way out but no; he had to be the "man" and had to lead us because he was a "man." Hello! You were the one who gotten us lost in the first place. I may not talk but when I shake my head and point to a direction that's the opposite I mean let's go there! (sighs) Stupid Azel! That's it! He is so fired! In fact, I don't remember how we got out. I think we went in a massive circle.

He may have the most beautiful hair, but he's an idiot and Calintz' mini bitch._ What would the Captain do? I wish the Captain was here! _If you love him so much why don't you marry him? Calintz was Agreian's bitch, and now he needs someone to wear the pants in the relationship which definatly isn't you. First he goes after airhead ho who's all boobs and no brain, and then he goes after her sister! Mind you, he was still seeing that Agreian slut. I'm sorry, but there is no way that man is straight. He slaps like a girl and he's such a momma's boy! He and Calintz make a perfect couple since Agreian whipped him into being his slave. _Oh Calintz, dearie, would you paint my nails? Calintz, fetch me some water in some desert. Darling, do my dirty work while I pamper my face using mother's make-up._ GAG! (rolls eyes) People and their relationship problems! Airhead ho had to invite that chick who couldn't find her deadbeat husband. Here's a pointer: He doesn't love you anymore because you look like a man! Don't get me wrong, I like Rianna, but do not invite someone because their relationship is a mess. No one wants to hear all of that whining about someone not loving someone. Boo Woo! Get over your love problems! (cough) HAREN (cough)

I'm done talking about their stupid relationship problems! I could rant all day about this, but I don't want to. I have a life and a world to take over. Let's see, I left off with a to do list: straggle Serina, steal an airship and kick Azel a couple more times. I would throw a rock at his head but he needs all the brain cells he needs. At least Reith had an excuse: she lost her memory and her brain wasn't working. (shudders) Don't get me started on how much of a pathetic moron she is. _Calintz let's be friends with these people who are trying to kill us! Let's sing around a campfire with them, and hold hands singing Kum-By-Ya! _Oh dear! I wish I had the chance to shoot her in the head. At least when she got her memory back her brain decided to work. Seriously, she made Paris Hilton look like a rocket scientist.

Bah! Getting so off topic! I have a world to conquer! How to steal that airship? Hummm... Since we are near the temple we might manage to find an airship lurking around. That's it! Since the Great Temple is only a few kilometres away, I'll steal the airship! How? hummm... use Azel as a distraction? I got it! I'll ask them to fly me someplace then hijack the ship! No one will suspect that sweet and innocent Maya is capable of hijacking an airship. Mwahahaha (evil smile) What about Azel? I'll just drop him off in some desert before I hijack the ship.It can be an "accident." Excellent! That takes care of the airship!

Dark Lady Maya's Plan: Phase Two

1) Steal that airship! It's about time! Once I have an airship I will have power! I will have transportation to travel all over Efferia and everyone will see my ship and bow down to Queen Binky the Great II! They will sing "God Protect Queen B" and they will worship her! They will build shrines of her and bow to her by swaying their arms up and down, while laying on the ground then on their knees. All history books will have her name in them and she will be a demi-god! Excellent! (evil smile)

2) Strangle Serina. Again, this is from phase one! I might pay a visit to headquarters and strangle her, but frankly, I don't think I have the time. I'll put this on hold.

3) Form some followers That's right, we need people. The more people we have the more power we have. If everyone is willing to serve Queen Binky the Great II, then taking over the world will be a lot easier. We will form a cult! When we land the hijacked airship, we will start a headquarters in, say, Remie! It's warm and there are a lot of people in that town. Although in Efor, people know me and might cave a little easier. Wait, there isn't enough people and they know me and if someone doesn't follow my secret plan will leak out and people will know everything! So, I will start by brainwashing the people of Remie!

I think that should be enough for one phase. The problem with the last phase was there were too many demands and too much stuff going on. Stick with a couple of things and work on those. Good things happen to those who wait, and it takes time to take over the world. Rome was certainly not built in a day! So ths plan is: "request a flight to Remie", drop Azel off in the desert (literally, while we are still in midair), and brainwash the people of Remie.

Wait, I thought of the most excellent plan: Become the Great Priestess of Amabalt!

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AN: Sorry Becky, you mentioned someone but I was busy throwing all of my ideas down for phase two before I forgot them. I'll add what you said into chapter four! Thanks for reading everyone and thank you Lilac Phoenix, Ice Seraphim, and XD for your reviews. Reviews make me smile and make me feel loved. 


	4. April 10

Entry Four:

Okay, I am now in Remie and we made it to the Great Temple thanks to me. NOT THANKS THAT IDIOT AZEL! I swear, he needs a tracking device or something. I'm so glad Calintz led us and not Azel on our journey. Knowing him, we would end up inside a volcano or some sort of deserted island in the middle of the ocean if it weren't for me. I prefer to be alone in a deserted island with a hot male model and not Azel. mmmmmm Fabio (drools) he is so sexy and masculine! (despite his name) Oh well, if we were alone Azel would end up getting lost or eaten by wolves and I would be alone with Fabio! (smiles) You know, Raul kinda looks like him, only not nearly as hot. If I were an old lady like Rianna or Mistress Ladrinne I would so go after Raul.

Back to the temple. When we got there I smiled and acted like a sweet little angel and submitted my application for the Great Priestess, now that my biggest rival, Justina, is gone. (snicker snicker) The rumours are true: every night they preserve Mistress Ladrinnes body that way she would last forever. She sleeps in some sort of capsule that's shaped like a coffin. Maybe she really is a vampire? I mean, she is in her fourties (well, that's what she says, she's probably one hundred years old) and looks twenty years younger. She's not gonna die, folks. I should steal that machine when I rule the world. Anywho, I'm now up for the running since Calintz put in a good word for me. hehehehehe. I made it into the finals and everyone on TV will see Queen Binky the Great II and me! It's the latest reality TV show! I will brainwash the judges. mwahahahaha.

We manage to ride the airship. (does happy dance) We, well Azel, said we needed transportation to Remie and The Alliance offered to give us a ride for half the price. (smiles) When we passed the desert I pushed (more like threw by "accident") him out of the window. mwahahahaha I win! When we landed, I froze the pilots and hide my new airship in the desert, chained and locked. MWAHAHAHAHAH I finally stole it! It's mine! MINE! All MINE! So now, the first segment of my phase is complete. Oh no! I forgot the theme music! How could I! Oh well, when I rule the world I'll have the best musicians create a theme song for Queen Binky the Great II and me! I was started to like the new theme music: "Don't cha!" After all, I am hotter than anyone's girlfriend. I don't think I need that machine Mistress Ladrinne uses because I'm so sexy, but it couldn't hurt.

Okay, so I'm here in Remie trying to convert these people to my cult. Guess who I met here! You're not going to guess it diary (well you can't obviously) so I'll tell you. REITH! If you think she was the biggest airhead before then you have to see her now. I swear, whenever she unleashes the magna carta it takes away her brain cells. That or she really is a moron who prob smoked too much dope and/or crack. Serina must have stolen all of the intelligence in the gene pool. Her memories too have disappeared so I lied and said she was a follower of Queen Binky the Great II. What, I need all the followers I can get; the stupider the better because they are easier to convert. After all, we just need to convince the majority of the population.

Well, I better get starting on this cult. Mwahahah each day I am getting one step closer to my plans. hehehehe

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AN: Sorry it took over a week but I have a live :P I type this song while listening to "What is Love" by Haddaway. I might make this her new theme music. It's kinda short, but I'm lazy :P 


	5. April 20

Entry Five:

This has been a fun week! (smiles) We started the cult! We even have our own building!!!! I kinda kicked some people out of it by literally sweeping them out of their house after I converted them, but it's for my plan! They are happy to live in a cardboard box, as long as Queen Binky the Great II's needs are fulfilled. It's not like I'm starving them, I give them raccoon meat that is classified as road kill every so often. The house is small, but it will serve as a headquarters for now. Now, as a candidate for the Great Priestess I have to do something good for these people. I'm thinking maybe I can fit in my cult in here somehow. If Remie is happy thanks to me I'll definitely win:) I do have a back up plan if I don't become the Great Priestess: become the Queen of the Yason Roven. Right now Orha is the king, but I'm sure if I marry him then kill him in his sleep that would work. Mwahahahaha. But Orha is sexy :( maybe kidnap him and give him to Serina-- that would please Reith now that Serina's away from Calintz! Perfect plan, now I don't have to ruin my manicure by strangling that bitch. I'll knock him over the head with a mallet to make sure his memories of being king are gone. I am such a genius! (does happy dance)

On the topic of Reith, she is really starting to annoy me. Her naïveté has given us more followers, but I swear she is such an idiot! Today she was wondering where the doughnut tree was because the she was hungry. That woman deserves a Darwin Award for everything that comes out of her mouth. Apparently, before I got here she worked at Hooters. Perfect place for her to work: requires no intelligence whatsoever. Her accounting ability is the equivalent to Haren's dancing ability. (it reminds me of Mr Bean, only he's dancing is humourous, Haren's is just sad) He needs to play DDR or something. Ooo I should add that to one of my phases: own all of the DDR machines and play it twenty-four seven!

Anywho, on to the rest of my story, we handed flyers to all of the towns and brainwashed most of these people. I got free jewellery from one shop. (smiles) (I'm stylish now) I was thinking of having the shards embedded into Queen Binky the Great II's crown since she deserves the best crown in the world. She can unleash the Magna Carta whenever she wants to. The thing is I have to find these shards, again! It took us so long to find all of these shards! Agreigan felt the need to brush his eyelashes instead of finding it himself. He's lazier than Homer Simpson! No wonder why his hair is so perfect-- he gets people to do his work for him he spends all day pampering himself. How about you go to a volcano and look sweaty and gross and then complain about split ends. Seriously, he calls his mother when he breaks a nail! _Mother, I broke a nail when I was sitting around starring at my beautiful self in the mirror! Help me! Call security! This is an urgent matter!_ He's more flamboyant than Boy George! I swear, he probably added a sex change to his 'to do list.' Knowing him, he was probably jealous of Calintz and Azel already looking feminine without a sex change. No wonder why he made us do all of his dirty work! Stupid jerk, rot in hell! Another thing to add to my to do list: Dance on his grave! Make out with Calintz on it! mwahahahah (evil snicker) That should make him green with envy.

Better re-write the to do list

1) Dance/make out on Agreian's grave

2) Buy all of the DDR machines

3) Become Queen of Yason, even if I am the Great Pristess

4) Knock Orha out and hide him in a room with Serina

5) Get the shards (maybe have someone else do it for me) and make a crown out of them

I wouldn't call this a phase, but definitely a to do list! What should I do to Reith, she's so stupid it's kind of sad. Nope, that would require more effort and I already am trying to take over the world. I'm only one person and educating her would take too long. Making Reith smart is like having pigs fly out of my ass, or having the pope join a punk band: it's never going to happen.

Right now, I'm in the Great Temple doing the primaries for the first round of the competition. The house is very spacious and decorated trendy. I would strangle... NO BURN... these girls but it would be caught on camera. Instead, I'll poison their food. mwahahahaha I'll maybe burn their clothes when they win a challenge. I haven't gotten to the point of burning Roxy's and Carian's stripper clothing. Oh well, they might as well wear nothing I mean come on! They make Paris Hilton on the same level of purity as the Virgin Mary! I might unleash some sort of demon if I burn it. Any way's the girls in this house are starting to annoy me. They think they are benefiting society, but really they are as idiotic as Reith in their ideas. _Let's bake chocolate chip cookies for the old people with Diabetes since they are going through so much. Let's plant a tree in the desert to bring life to it. _Let's use our brains for once! "All for the Queen," I keep telling myself, "It's only a few weeks and each week one moron is sent home!" These girls's haven't completely bothered me yet, so I think right now I should be fine. Anyways, Dark Lady Maya needs her beauty sleep. 

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It's updated! I won't update soon because I have to update three other stories :( I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Thanks for reading and please review!


	6. May 11

Entry Six 

GAH! Oh man, so many things have happened this past month. So many things... The reason why I haven't written in a while is because those stupid idiots kept being annoying! I want to popped off all of their heads and burn them! Imagine, a house full of hippy, loving, morons who want to know people and make them happy and renew their spirits. I have to live with these bozos twenty-four seven! Were their parent's siblings? How did they get so stupid? (glares) Seriously, they keep asking me, "What's wrong, you look sad! How come you don't talk? I want to help you. Let's sing a happy song and frolic through the woods like a bunch of stoners!" You asking me that question all the time is making me want to become more silent! I honestly can't stand them so I quit the show. I don't care if I'm the Great Priestess I am not spending another day with those morons. How can I write my plans when they are hovering over my shoulder trying to "cheer me up" They gave me some rat looking creature proclaiming "it's cute," but it looked more like someone you'd run over and not care for. Maybe even exterminate and claim it's vermin. They made me a meal and went around in a circle telling me what they liked about me. I thought this was a reality show for the Great Priestess, not an alcoholics anonymous meeting. You know what, I do not regret leaving that show! Being badass is way better than being goodass. I mean, I'm a dark lady not a light lady. Becoming the Queen of Yason-Roven is a much cooler title.

I got that off my chest! (takes a deep breath) I came back to Remie to work on the cult. To my surprise, we have more followers! It's a miracle! (does happy dance) More than half of the town down has joined my cult! Most of them are males because Reith does have one advantage: her body. I find it so degrading how women on the television are being seen as sexual objects rather than human beings, but I have to admit, if it isn't for Reith none of the males would join. They probably thought it was a strip club and entered curiously, and ended up being brainwashed. That's it! I'm a genius! Somehow create a trail of Reith's pictures and have them enter the headquarters. Knock them over the head with a frying pan and brainwash them. Excellent! (evil laugh)mwahaha Men are so stupid. They have a one-track mind which women can easily use to their advantage. Wave a pretty girl in front of them and they drool like a bunch of dogs and follow it as if they were hypnotised. There was a reason why women were put on Earth: to balance the stupidity of men. When I rule the world, degrading women would be a criminal offence. The media won't be showing skanky chicks wearing practically nothing. It's about time women stepped up and started being respected for who they are and not because of their body.

On to my plan in becoming the Queen of Yason-Rover. hmmm... what should I do... how can I capture Orha. Form an army and conquer the Yason-Rover? Sounds like a plan. Create more followers and have them attack the Yason-Rover. Wait, they I'll be ruling a wasteland. How about seduce him using the one-track mind of men. Sounds like the plan. Have a trail of Reith pictures in a bikini and have him leave the castle. Whack him over the head with a frying pan, throw him into a room with Serina, and rule Yason-Rover.I hate to resort to this, but they're men! Hmmm... how about sports photos instead or money. Excellent! I'll use "rare car photos!" There, I can sleep at night now. I have to get my rest; my ears are still ringing with the high-pitched voices of those idiots. I have a world to conquer!

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AN: Thank you Lilac Phoenix, Ice-Seraphim, Jaelle 89, XD, Creative Tendencies, and Flame Rising for all the reviews. Especially, thank you Flame Rising for motivating me into writing the next chapter and helping me improve me work. That review you gave me really motivated me! Thanks! Sorry guys, I havn't updated in a while because I started a new story. I'll update quicker next time.


	7. June 12

Entry Seven

It's been a month now since I haven't written an article. Am I losing faith in my plans? Well, I have been so busy. Yason-Roven from Amabat is far away and I couldn't get anywhere without idiots stopping me every five seconds going, "Oooo you're that silent girl from The Great Pristess show!! Can I have your picture? Can I have your autograph?" I thought like saying, "Can I club your head to make you shut up?" But when they said, "you were my favourite," and, "you should have won" I had to stop. A grin rose from my cheeks as I laughed in between my teeth. My plan is working! They are starting to worship me! Dark Lady Maya is loved! Mwahahahaa!! That show wasn't a waste. They adore me! They wanted me to rule Amabat! So, I motioned them to follow me and I took them to my cult in Remie. I even have a fan club where people subscribe by the mail and I sent them photos and crappy merchandise my brainwashed members made. It's kinda like a sweatshop but I need to keep them busy. If they keep thinking then they will stray from my cult. More people visit my headquarters from the address of the fan club. It got so big I had to renovate and now it's a super cult. ehehehehehe.

Anyways, that was only some of the month. A few days ago I entered Yason-Roven for phase um... I forget what phase I'm on there have been so many! Let's say phase 0759328759843. I went to visit Orha and he was still in his room crying over Reith on guess whose shoulder... Calintz! Those two kept bawling their eyes out, blowing their nose in Kleenex like some emo kid who didn't get an iPod for Christmas. I told them Reith was still alive and brain-dead and they popped out of their seats like a toaster._ Excellent _I thought. I told them to follow me so I did and I whacked them over the head with a frying pan. What? I had to see if it would work and it did! They even had Xs as eyes! So I put a ring on my finger and waited for Orha to wake up. I also had Calintz shipped off to Remie since he needed to complete his "training" to become a member of the Queen Binky the Great II cult. I'm now waiting for Orha to wake up. I even poke him with a stick a couple of times but he sleeps like a baby. Oh, he's alive! His snoring is so loud it's like a teenager getting a drum set for the first time. After all, I don't want my new fiancé to die on me.

Plans on when he wakes up:

Tell Orha I want to get married tomorrow: I can't wait until I'm the queen of Yason-Roven

Tell the Yason's I'll plant more trees: As I said before, this is a wasteland so make it pretty. I'm not one of those stereotypical evil people who like decaying trees and my front lawn having nothing but dirt like Hallowe'en threw up on my lair. Aesthetics is a must. But not too sunshine and roses.

Tell the Yason's I'll lower their taxes and more money will be out into schools and hosptials: This doesn't make sense but I need them to love me. I'm a politician now so I have to get used to lying to maintain my leadership.

So ya, that's the plan. After I rule Yason-Roven, I'll conquer Marccatte then Amabat.

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It's been over a year since I updated this story so I made it seem like month. If it wasn't for Flame Rising motiviating me to keep writing I wouldn't have wrote this so soon. I think I'll dedicate this story to him. Oh, you didn't leave your real name, which is sad because I really wanted to read your stories. Don't worry I'm not one of those immature people who flame people with a fake name. Have fun reading my story everyone!


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